Rough Week and Counting Blessings

This week has been a rough one. Nothing big, just everyone struggling with each other. Jack has been a whiny mess, Levi is crazy as usual, and Sean and I both are losing our patience. I feel like I need a break from motherhood for a few days! It's hard to keep giving love and patience when I'm at the end of my rope. Today in particular was hard. I had a goal of getting the house clean. All day I either cleaning, nursing, changing diapers, breaking up fights, feeding kids, etc. And the house looks worse then it did this morning. Minus the kitchen. At least the dishes are clean. But the rest of the house is trashed. And I didn't get a single break today. No moment to just sit and rest with no kids needing me. It was so hard. Yesterday was really hard too with tantruming boys. So the 2 days combined were just ROUGH. I have to remember to count my blessings at the end of each day. Today, I got dinner made (thanks to an InstaPot that Sean got me for my birthday!), and the boys ate all of it. And Jack put away his toys. He whined the whole time, and it took a few threats, but he did it. Without me having to get down and help him (I couldn't since I was nursing). Now to figure out how to motivate him without threats. I hate constantly saying "do this or you get a timeout" or "do this or I have to take away your toy." It's not fun, and I want him to figure out how to listen! It's so frustrating! I feel like such an awful mom cuz all I do is threaten all. day. long. 

Those are my thoughts for today. Praying for help from Heavenly Father. I liked what Candace texted me today. Jack needs a lot of love. A lot of cuddles, and soft voices. "Don't try to have more patience, have more love 💕💗💕 That helps me more 💕" Yelling really effects him negatively. Plus I hate yelling, and I do way too much of it. He has a sensitive, sweet personality and I need to remember that when I am trying to teach him. I really love my boy so so much. I want to be a loving mother, not an angry one.

Here's to beginning a new week tomorrow.

Oh! Funny thing from tonight. For some reasons kisses makes all things better. Whenever Jack gets hurt he asks for kisses, and suddenly it doesn't hurt anymore. Tonight he had a spot on his bum that hurt. I never thought I'd ever hear, "I want mommy to kiss my bum!" 😂. I had to try to explain why kissing bums is not ok. That made for an interesting bedtime.